Shane, Josiah, and I went swimming last weekend at a friend's apartment pool. When we arrived, it was just us, a couple getting their tan on, and a family with a toddler having a pool party cookout. The family spoke Spanish and had a boombox playing Latino music. With just about every song that would play, you'd see Josiah bopping his head and smiling. There was one point where the dad came over with his toddler daughter, let her and Josiah hold hands, and splash each other in the pool. You rarely see people of different race or ethinicities mingle here in Alabama, especially if there is a language barrier. Whenever I see things like this with Josiah, I am reminded we are not born racist or prejudice.
I have found Josiah does not hate or unlike anyone. I know he loves me a lot because of all the snuggles and smiles I receive. He cannot speak yet so when he does not like something I'm doing, he lets me know by whining, crying, or shaking his hand toward me. It's as though he's saying, "I love you but I don't like what you are doing." Since observing this I have been encouraged to remove the thoughts/words "I don't like/ hate her or him" from my vocabulary. I'm not sure at what point of my life I changed from where Josiah is to where I attack someone's persona. The funny thing is when I say, "I don't like her," it's not even true. It cannot possibly be true because when I say it I either don't really know the person I am talking about or worse, they used to be a friend. It's their action(s) that I don't like and I need to identify that before I convince myself it's their whole character. I had a close friend who began having kids long before I did. Naturally our friendship started to diminish because we were on separate life paths. At some point I said to myself, "I don't like her anymore," but what I really meant was, "I don't like that we are not close anymore."
Someone once told me that hurt people hurt people. It hurts when I find out people don't like something I've done and as a result cut me from their lives, deciding they don't like me. I wish to do my best to keep myself from being the victim who turns around and hurts others. I know one day Josiah will get his feelings hurt. When that day comes, I hope I had learned enough about love from him to keep myself from inadvertently teaching him to hate.
Kids are awesome and their innocence is precious and inspiring.
Someone once told me that hurt people hurt people. It hurts when I find out people don't like something I've done and as a result cut me from their lives, deciding they don't like me. I wish to do my best to keep myself from being the victim who turns around and hurts others. I know one day Josiah will get his feelings hurt. When that day comes, I hope I had learned enough about love from him to keep myself from inadvertently teaching him to hate.
Kids are awesome and their innocence is precious and inspiring.